Monday, 20 November 2023

Tarzan: Natural Mayombean Beauty

The Mayombe rainforest is perhaps the most biodiverse ecoregion in all the Central African nations just south of both Sanaga and Nyong but west of the actual Congo River Basin. Even when it still does exist in the far future, if at all, some of it will mostly consist of various abandoned settlements. 

In a more hopeful note, it’s possible that many of Mayombe’s wild animals are still trying to adapt in the midst of a big change. Even when the Gorillas and Chimps may rebound in terms of population numbers, a few other kinds of plausible great apes and hominids may appear at any time. That includes the Ogre Mangani and its nearby offshoots, which are amongst the most dangerous of them all. Other than that, a bunch of other breakaway Mangani clans who live in many Chibungu (Villages of the Dead) and who have their own Chinkumbi, Banchondi, Bamuéné, Banganga, Bampunzi, Bavinji and Bandochi, are just as dangerous, if not much worse than their fellow kin. In a happy twist of irony, there are mud apes and swamp apes, better known as Anglophone Minority World curios, rather than actually being from a mix of both coastal West Central African and Native North American mythologies. Other inhabitants include the dreaded AgroPelter. 

There are also south-central chimpanzees, African forest elephants, bay duikers, greater spot nosed guenons, Gabon talapoins, yellow backed duikers, Malbrouck monkeys, black collared lovebirds, Lord Derby’s anomalures, crested Mona guenons, Stanger’s giant squirrels, water chevrotains, Central African linsangs, western lowland gorillas, Side Striped Jackals, African golden cats (aka jungle caracals), Egyptian mongooses, red headed lovebirds, white bellied duikers, greater cane rats, rusty spotted genets, black fronted duikers, white crested (African) tiger herons, African civets, servaline genets, black footed mongooses, straw coloured fruit bats, Sitatungas, Egyptian rousette bats, red tailed African grey parrots, blue duikers, African palm civets, African leopards, Beecroft’s anomalures and mandrills. 

In the villages, the dwarf goats, village dogs and dwarf sheep are often seen flocking around. The various kinds of True and False Manganis, living in numerous Chibindu (Valleys), may also be prominently shown in the serial story, perhaps because a few of their plausible inspirations come from both Yombe and Vili mythologies. 

There are also the usual spirits from the Kongo group of mythologies, which come in the forms of Minchondi, Minchisi, Misimbi and Michinda. Then there are the Chinkokó, mix and match familiars created from various dead nonhumans and humans. There are also the infamous magical pots known as the Nzungu Madungu. 


Sunday, 19 November 2023

Tarzan of the Apes between Moon Spirit and Meeting Jane

Adulthood 

18 years old 

Getting to Know Linda: Tarzan first met Linda Reed and Ruby’s father Professor Jeremy Smith, zoologists who were shipwrecked into the jungle following a shitstorm of rip roaring waves which stranded them out of their intended destination. At the same time, Linda was introduced to a bunch of gorillas looking for food, but they’re rather flighty and thus would run away out of well meaning worry. 

Mutiny by Tom Lawley and Max Esker: A week later, Ruby Smith and fellow explorers were being gaslighted, marooned and then betrayed by Max Esker and Tom Lawley. Then again, the two villainous friends escaped away from their much more horrible wives who themselves lived in London. Still, as Max and Tom’s friend Samuel Davies came back to the jungle a jaded man for the second time, they’d rather loot for more local crafts rather than poaching way too many animals like the last time they did. 

Battling Sea Mangani Goons: As Ruby Smith and her friends were marooned and then betrayed by Tom Lawley and Max Esker, Tarzan would win the hearts of almost all his other animal friends in a battle against a gang of Sea Mangani goons by plonking with his spear against their weakest member. Given that such Sea Mangani goons were hired by the tribe’s own parochial chieftain to harass their fellows, they might’ve been dangerous even to the rest of their community before dying off. Rex was amongst the crowd spectators in the battle.

First Meeting With Ruby Smith: Shortly after Tarzan finished battling the Sea Mangani goons by killing their weakest member, he first saw an exhausted and confused Ruby Smith being harassed by a crowd of mandrills thanks to having a well meaning spat with a moody, toddling Mandrill named Manu, who fanboyed over her drawings. Then he’ll send her off to the (not yet fully renovated) treehouse cafe run by her friend Isabelle Parker (James Parker’s middle niece). 

Gawking at a Jumble Sale: As the marooned explorers have had to make do by building a few other treehouses, James Parker himself left out some of his own stuff in a kiosk outside, while the other kiosks have only just arrived out of London suburbia for goodness sake! That being said, Tantor and his friends gawk at the arrival of a single jumble sale but couldn’t intend to wreck all parts of it, so they have to leave the jumble sale at a grumpy Matt’s request. Sadly, since Matt now was not quite mentally well anymore, he also fought Marla and bruised her, thus both would grow astray as they’re now emotionally more fragile and distant than before. 

Moon Spirit Spectacle: 3 months later, Linda Reed and Vera Parker showed off a projector to an overexcited Tarzan, who himself was dancing with his girlfriend Ruby Smith. Now that they saw the projector would they come to see a lunar spectacle. 
 
The Beginning of a New Bond: Kala was such a good teacher to Tarzan, that even months after she met her sad fate at the hands of a dozen Ogre Mangani goons wearing a ton of simple bling, Tarzan continued to read loads of diverse books not only alone, but also with other people such as Linda Reed and her friends. Meanwhile, Florentino Baldocchi was looting for treasure in some parts of a village full of exploited and unsatisfied natives, some of whom have family members being former part time pirates. 

Hiking Day: As Tarzan woke up from his new pup tent, he surfs into the trees and then goes around with Nell McKnight as both heroes walked away safely from Tom Lawley and his own dysfunctional gang of touristing crooks. They pestered Linda Reed to go on a hair-raising hike upon trees full of small critters, as well as an occasional Mangani tribesman over there. Then Tarzan had to spend his best night in the middle of a year with his girlfriend Ruby Smith, giving her the swinging motion she needed before going to bed.

Mud Prison: Tom Lawley had left his wailing longtime friend Max Esker behind in a mud prison, and so gaslighted the heroes in order to protect them, rather ironically, from a bevy of utter monsters - who indeed were coming to the coastal jungle days later - which suggested that the other touristing crooks also felt abandoned by him even in prison, just as he unfortunately poached two gorillas (who turned out to be Bruce’s parents) along with his ‘boyfriend’ Samuel Davies out in the wilderness.

Escaping the Mud Prison: Still, even after 3 months of partly staying in the prison, only the surviving Bronx Rogues - plus Linda’s estranged uncle Parry ‘Snitch’ Reed and Drew Hamilton - have escaped the mud prison because Jeff Brooks and Kevin Griffin, the true human monsters of the tale’s fourth arc, let the Spy Cornelius Wood be shot to death by a firing squad of pirates. Meanwhile, Joe Peter Moran tried to kill both Tarzan and James Parker before moving on. 

A Birthday without a Break in between: Tarzan had to dress up for James’ 60th birthday so that he would see James Parker’s 3 nieces fully renovate the treehouse cafe in its entirety. Still, Jeff Brooks and Kevin Griffin would submerge some of the crooks and chopped many of them to death in an open mud prison.

Sending The Bronx Rogues Back To America: Since Jonathan and Horace Brown were drunkard hunters who hunted too many bisons and turned into master perverts who pimped former soldiers with glee, they were inevitably killed by Tarzan a la Full Nelson for basically a rather good reason: they SA’d a defenceless spy named Dewey and left him dead. Thus, Tarzan himself had to spare the other, less heinous but still villainous crooks, the utterly horrific pain of being SA’d all over again as he would see Matt become trampled by a really nasty hippopotamus an hour later.  

Hippo Attack: An hour after Tarzan paroled the Bronx Rogues from mud prison and sending them back home into America, he saw a madly frightened Matt being dumped by an increasingly embittered Marla at last, who had to let him be trampled by a mad and rowdy hippo in a no hands beatdown. With a sorrowful expression towards Marla doing a downplayed heel turn, he now knew that she’s had enough with the equally senile Matt, who’s not mentally well anymore and still was on his last legs anyway.

Jeff Brooks Killed Tom Lawley: After paroling some of his own surviving enemies (all crooks, though most are not on a magnificent bastard level) from a rather filthy open mud prison, Tarzan saw the horrible Jeff Brooks killing the gullibly greedy Tom Lawley, who ironically gaslighted Tarzan a few times just in order to actually protect him from the worst such harm imaginable. Understandably, he felt remorseful when it turned out that Tom Lawley was a snidely boss with a horrible family life. Still, his only current bird friend, who has scratched a part of his right arm out of confusion-induced anger and worry, is a female green pigeon named Arina, a next door neighbour.

Linda Returned to the Treehouse Cafe: After spending a week at the partially looted village by studying its local people, Linda Reed returned to the Treehouse Cafe at last. Tellingly, Tarzan and James Parker were cheering for her as she returned to a fully renovated Treehouse Cafe full of busy nouveau riche people. 

19 years old

Christmas: As a nineteen year old man, Tarzan would make a fake Christmas tree for Linda Reed and her friends, with the precision of a metal smith. 

Meeting Gortak Again: 2 years after wrestling with Tarzan, a rather lonely Gortak had now eaten a toe in his right foot with lonesome sadness, since it has become too infected for him to handle, and he’s also been saving off various fruits from Kerchak, who had now become a full on meat eater. He has saved off the fruits from the Mangani menace so that he’d stay full before sleeping at night. In fairness, he is sometimes nasty towards most humans living near him, if largely because he’s lost his beloved daughter (Flynt’s older sister Verona) to Jeff Brooks and he’s also been sexually harassed by his wife Gerla for so long that he’s now a vagrant living alone. He now had gained some respect for Tarzan by revealing that he never wanted to get killed by the feral young man. 

Tarzan Killed Gerla: Gerla, who had become a soul wrenchingly axe crazy gorilla, would now be killed by Tarzan in a dastardly tournament. 

20 years old 









Saturday, 18 November 2023

Disney Reboot Mangani and fellow ApeMen

The Mangani Civilians 

Akut - The Akut (meaning both jester and wise man in the rough, grunt-ridden language of his fellow Mangani males) is one of Tarzan’s friends, who happens to be an older member of the Meriem, Korak and Akut trio. To be fair, his real name is Sen and he’s actually Molak’s estranged pupil who had to leave his makeshift tribe on his own accord, before being kidnapped into a circus by Nikolai Rockoff and Alexei Pavlovic. 

Molak - Molak, a forgetful and klutzy chieftain of his makeshift tribe.

Gaftra - Gaftra was Molak’s equally senile and rather forgetful wife. 

The Snow Mangani   

Momu - Momu is a snow mangani shaman who initially distrusts Tarzan until they find a way to share things. He is the wise old guy to Tarzan’s guile. 

The Sea Mangani and allies 

Keeta -  

Chakat - 

Gulchak - Gulchak was a furry pirate sailing away from the most infamous goons of his tribe. 

The Jungle Giants (aka Ogre Mangani) 

Chulk - 

Taglat - 

Keeka - Keeka was Tarzan’s estranged Mangani friend, who cheated upon him for a well meant reason; she had to teach her fellow boyfriend Taoug a lot of lessons, so he slowly warmed up to her later, birthing a boy named Gazan in the process. 

Taoug - Taoug was actually a street smart yet somewhat immature and sullen guy amongst Tarzan’s Mangani rivals. He also was a bully to Tarzan when both became estranged from each other following incidents involving his own klutz of a mother.

Toog - A gross looking hermit who reluctantly was hired by a bunch of travelling goons, which led to him abducting Keeka out of well meant worry from her abode. As a result, Tarzan had to let Tantor fight him to death, in order to properly send her off to her pup tent for a wedding to Taoug that they would indeed finalise, once Taoug would become old and infertile many years afterwards. 

Gazan - Gazan was born some months after when Keeka was freed from being made a captive by the pirates, with the help of her estranged former friend Tarzan. Being a plucky boy, he has survived various attacks by many other beasts. 

Kerchak - Kerchak himself ate Kala’s toddler son in a fit of hungry aggression as he forced his privates into Tublat’s own, suggesting that Tublat also was a baby factory for his more despicable mate and wife. The more well meaning Mangani fellows have to become aware of his part time cannibal might, so that Kala will survive being with her newfound foster son Tarzan. 

Kala - Kala was both a fighter and a brilliant mind even amongst her Mangani fellows, who not only had to thrive and survive by fostering Tarzan, but also taught her adoptive son by learning how to read the books of the boy’s birth parents. 

Tublat - Tublat was somewhat notorious even amongst the Mangani, though less so than Kerchak, and yet his history as a sex assault victim had made him painfully cry, so much so that when he was 72 human years old, he saw his death coming right upon his eyes from the spear and hunting knife of foster grandson Tarzan. After that, Tarzan himself had to leave Tublat’s remains behind for Kerchak to eat. In fairness, Tublat himself almost killed his foster daughter Kala simultaneously because he’s far too drunk to recognise her immediately. 

Torkoz - Torkoz was a byproduct of Tublat being SA’D by his mate. He was also pretty rotten to the core, eating even his friends when he went into many a cannibalistic spree. 

Neeta - Neeta was a friend of both the nomadic Keeka and Taug before becoming eaten by crocodiles. 

Mamka - Mamka was a Mangani ApeWoman who happened to be one of Kala’s friends. 

Karnath - Karnath, an estranged friend of Kala, might’ve become a leader for a longer time if not for his serial long term aggression episodes. Still, he was much saner than all three of his predecessors.


Friday, 17 November 2023

Disney Reboot Oparians

The Oparians 

La of Opar -

Kaj - Kaj was the most famous of Opar’s high priests for a lot of the bad reasons. He was basically a cannibal upper hand to his fellows and would die along with Oah in a mighty tribe-ridden battle, and it is poor Dooth who would bury him later. 

Tal Tha - Tal is most likely Kaj’s and Dooth’s predecessor. He was one of the high priests in Opar before becoming a cannibal, eating fellow priests and then dying at the hands of Tarzan.

Blk - 

Gulm - 

Ulp - 

Dooth - Dooth is perhaps Opar’s high priest after Tal Tha and Kaj. 

Oah - Oah was High Priestess La of Opar’s traitorous bodyguard who attempted to become a replacement for her, only to get whacked to death. 

Thursday, 16 November 2023

Tarzan’s fashion

The fashion that Tarzan wears is perhaps indicative of the character having long been an icon for so many people regardless of gender since ERB’s death and particularly from the fall of 1965 onwards when Russ Manning created his own series of defining Tarzan designs. 

The briefs and loincloths that Tarzan wears have taken a big quality stride in terms of fanservice from their boring, PG-rated roots, in that they show more appreciation for both his privates and his own tits. 

Furry spotted hipster brief - A triumphant Tarzan lives in a tropical treehouse sauna filled with briefs and loincloths, but a spotted example made of old leopard fur has long been one of his all time favourites. Of the accessories for his own hipster brief, a lighter brown belt may be recommended, but both are more commonly clad by a loincloth which acts like a raincoat to them. 

Sauna Loincloth - This is his sauna loincloth, which may be  old, but still helps him well when he relaxes in the sauna. 

Wednesday, 15 November 2023

Casting the Other Allies

Casting the Other Allies

The Waziri 
Imani Lewis as Madari - In order to fight like a Mangani, Madari, a young woman, will break so many complacent and ageing traditions that she will lead her fellow well meaning Waziris in order to let themselves run wild against both the local and foreign terrorists logging large parts of their sacred gardens. 
Dawnn Lewis as Risia - Risia is the half nude elder matron of the semi-rural Waziris living near a small but luckily improving hill station town, surrounded by both jungle and gardens. 
Curtis Harris as Usula - Usula is one of Tarzan’s more educated Waziri friends, who writes his letters to him when Tarzan himself was absent from their town.
Dani Chambers as Kadena - Kadena is a stubborn yet caring woman somewhat older than Tarzan and Jane, who still loves her boyfriend and later husband Busani deep down. 
Gary Dourdan as Mumoni Keewazi - Mumoni is another firm yet cool old guy near the hill station town increasingly inhabited by fellow Waziris, though that comes at the agitating cost of Brits alienating them from getting more jobs. 
Michael Beach as Kanzuma - Kanzuma was the bearded village hero turned elder who preceded his friend Basuli and daughter Kadena. 
Sharif Atkins as Shongi - Though still somewhat sympathetic, Shongi begins his appearance as a roguish and sometimes nasty bully of a bandit who cheated on the whole village. Then again, at least almost everybody would just banish him for a few years, until it’s suddenly revealed that he was cheated and neglected for many years by his former wife, which kind of exacerbated his terrible home life to get the better of him sometimes. 
Phil LaMarr as Basuli - Basuli is the top elder of a semi-rural Waziri community in a budding hill station town, who reluctantly accepts a new generation of less popular but humbler people once his abdication is made obvious by the rousingly bittersweet speech of his pupil Tarzan. 
Brandon T. Jackson as Muviro - Muviro is the bald friend of Basuli, foster dad of Kadena and teacher of Busani.  
Aaron Moten as Busani - Busani is the strong willed but still optimistic boyfriend and later husband of Kadena. 
Tahj Bellow as Mutomi - Basuli’s son who also abdicated the tired and sagging Waziri council after his own dad did during a horrific evacuation by a bunch of terrifying loggers. 

The Villagers 
Leah Sava Jeffries as Nienzi - Nienzi is a good old goofball who also has a firm hearted side. 
Kevin Michael Richardson as Snakehead (minor) - Snakehead is a villainous snake oil salesman, who actually was unfairly deported by his fellow former friends, no wonder why he later gets defeated by Tarzan and the animals for selling off scam products. Still, he might’ve had a pretty sad and troubling backstory leading to him resorting to scams. 
Chase Dillon as 

Allied Guests 
Frances Callier as Frances McFadden (minor, guest, tourist) - Frances is a well meant busybody who nonetheless causes some ruckus in hard situations, yet still loves to write the hell out of fanfics about tough men finding love. 
Angela V Shelton as Angela Thompson (minor, guest, tourist) - Although being a good friend, Angela is somewhat serious in comparison to Frances’ humorous goodie bits, though both also enjoy writing fanfics about a boy who becomes a top dog of his adopted tribe. 

Journalists 
Katie Crown as 
Carol Anne Day 
Tia Anne Ballard as Kate McCormick - Kate is Polly’s fellow adventurous friend who has studied some tropical cultures for a years. She went missing for months until being found by Tarzan in a smallish temple full of skulls.
Katie Crown as
Meg Donnelly as Polly Morrison - Polly is an intrepid journalist who has written about the anthropology of multiple cultures before meeting Tarzan. 

The Others 
AnaSofia Bianchi as 
Scarlett Estevez as 
Lara McDonnell as 
Ry McKeand as
Ava Bianchi as 
Scarlett Fernandez as 
Amanda Donohoe as Mercy Hudson - Mercy is a rather moody and yet comically unfazed schoolteacher who taught both Margaret Durham and Eleanor Burns in their youth. 
Julie Lemieux as 
Dafne Keen as 
Helena Barlow as Sandra La Ronde - Sandra is Reynard’s wife. 
Sunny Suljic as
Cherami Leigh as 
Bella Samman as 
Siena Agudong as 
Kira Tantao as 



Tuesday, 14 November 2023

Tarzan of the apes after meeting Jane

Adulthood 
21 years old
Harassing Jane: Tarzan first met Jane Porter after winning a very horrific battle against the cannibalistic Torkoz, who ate many members of his adoptive Mangani tribe. Unfortunately, since Tarzan wasn’t in his right mind, he harassed Jane so much that she’d rather leave him behind, if not for a fated engagement in Opar. 

22 years old
Tarzan and Jane are finally engaged.

23 years old

24 years old

25 years old

26 years old

28 years old

30 years old

32 years old

33 years old

34 years old

35 years old

The ahead of time and relevant tradition of a Tarzan and his adopted kids needs more vindication than ever!

Dear Disney’s Tarzan fans, I think it’s still for the best that Disney’s Tarzan needs to have an unrelated adopted kid first, which is perha...